Sitting outside a Starbucks, it’s dusk, darkening slowly. Another resignation letter under my belt, tomorrow is my last day at the job I’ve gone back to repeatedly out of convenience and comfort. Maybe the choices were misguided. I did what I thought was best.

I applied to a university in Taipei to enter as a student of their Mandarin Training Center. Hopefully in a few months I will be on the other side of the world splitting my head open over studies instead of trying to occupy my time here with things other than sleep and painful thoughts of the past and an imaginary future.

I’m really excited about this move–it’s something I’ve wanted to do for years, basically since college, but has been on the backburner as I’ve tried a few other avenues and given a some non-Asian continents as shot at claiming me as a resident.

It’s a calm night. I used to write more. I used to take more photos. It’s coming back as I re-enter this atmosphere from the anhedonic state I’ve been existing in. Today I went for a walk and hung out with some insect friends, then some human friends; both activities felt rewarding and self-reinforcing.

So again, going forward with a minimal plan and working toward no expectation, I will soon be headed on another ostensible journey. Just being able to experience the emotion of excitement again is a major step forward and I’m thankful I’ve made it this far.