Suzhou, China (中国, 苏州) – 2011
This one time I met a guy in a Starbucks in Shanghai. I could tell he was a photographer by the way he looked at me. He had a paper shopping bag next to him from which he discreetly pulled over $20,000 worth of photo equipment and asked to take my picture with Shawna. Our friendship was born.
Two days later we decided split a rental car and take a roadtrip to a neighboring province and see the famous garden palace of a corrupt government official. On the way there Larry complained about the quality of paper products in China and the lack of Saltine crackers—the trip was a success beyond belief.
-
- Chicken feet…great snack…and luckily, they’re available at every convenience store.
-
- The Humble Administrator’s Garden. Supposedly this public official didn’t like his job so he moved here and built a badass garden. I think that is actually the definition of humble.
-
- This tree was deemed a dissident by the Chinese government. It is now imprisoned and has shoddy internet access.
-
- Here we are taking a lunch break in Suzhou, also called “Venice of the East” because little rivers run through the city. A number of cities in China have adopted the “Venice” phrase as a tourist slogan, replacing the former, catchier slogan, “Not Worth Visiting”.
-
- “recyclable garbage” or “not recovery garbage”…I don’t think most people here can read, because a lot of them just throw their trash and recyclables straight on the ground.
-
- These bros just loooooove to play in the mud. Reconstructing outdated buildings with ancient Legos…that’s just “their thing”…their wives don’t even have to know.
-
- Some intricate patterns in the shingles; they are kind of hard to see at this size, but they are little circular designs right under the ridges.
-
- Use condom when mount cultural relic, prevent danger baby, creative thinking. -Ancient Chinese proverb
-
- Tiger Hill, Suzhou. I was holding the camera level–it is actually leaning over like that. We were kind of bummed that you can no longer go up it…but it looks like it would fall over if a bird landed on the top, so it was probably best.
-
- No one in eastern China exists under a blue sky…unless “blue” was a failed translation of the Chinese term for “extremely polluted”.
-
- Shawna really likes the rounded doorways. Who am I kidding…I do too.
-
- Little baby pagoda tucked away. This was at Tiger Hill, one of the most beautiful and lush areas we’ve seen so far.
-
- Hard to deny that this is true…
-
- I don’t know why the Chinese created these oversized Jester hats everywhere. What’s funny is that this is actually one of the tinier hats and I still haven’t seen anybody here who it would fit comfortably on.
-
- Larry, walking through a little market filled with random junk and unsanitary food.
-
- I have met guys who were much better at reading maps…
-
- A tiny bridge over a canal running through a small town outside of Suzhou.
-
- A street puppy. I told him to get a job and stop sleeping during business hours.
-
- Cross-street boat traffic was horrible…jk.
-
- Some guy with chickens under his table…wouldn’t want to play cards with him. If you’ll notice, he also tucked his wife beater into shorts.
